The highest pleasure and sense of
satisfaction known to man is when two people come together to experience
a moment of ecstasy, a moment of life. Like the musical note that stands
alone, the acts of an individual cannot produce the melodious medley of
life. Just as music is created when an individual note is placed in
relationships to other notes, the joy of living only occurs as an
individual moves into harmonious interaction with others sharing the
same moment of time.
Everyone can experience the joy of living, but few ever mature to live
consistently the good life. Relationships evolve around three key
ingredients: pleasure, utility, and love. Although all relationships are
initially experienced for pleasure (the participants receive pleasure
out of the interaction) and utility (the participants are using each
other for some cause), the good life does not occur unless the
relationship moves into the mystery of love.
The most basic interaction of man towards another is one of pleasure. A
relationship or friendship will exist when the participants are
receiving pleasure out of the interaction. If it feels good, we are
willing to interact.
Obviously, this relationship is stable only as long as gratification is
being received by both individuals. If someone else comes along and this
new person is perceived to be more pleasurable, the relationship between
the original two becomes fragile. When pleasure is no longer being
experienced by either of the participants, this basic relationship will
end.
Relationships can also be friendships of utility. Two may enter into a
relationship because each person can be of use to the other. They both
are receiving some sort of satisfaction of needs being met from the
affiliation. If a service is provided, we are willing to enter into a
relationship.
The relationship of utility is also anemic. When one determines that the
other is no longer useful, the interaction becomes tedious. If someone
else is perceived to be of more use, the fervency of the original
relationship will also weaken. It will also end, if it is perceived that
the relationship is no longer of value by one or both of the
participants.
Finally, there is the relationship of love. Beyond the limits of
personal pleasure and personal usefulness, this interaction thrives upon
making sure the needs of others are not neglected. Since all that one
has in life has been given to him, these generously given gifts must be
generously shared. Love is always kind and longsuffering towards others.
Love never seeks its own. Restraints against personal gain are always
exercised when it comes to the scheme of experiencing life. The loving
person never puts himself first, never claims his own share of things
when it would deprive the needs of others. It is the enhancement of
others at one’s own expense.
Although all natural relationships are entered into so that the
individual can enhance his own self, the relationship of love exists
solely for the enhancement of others. It "beareth all things,
believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things" (1
Cor. 13:7) in the interaction of its participants. It is when the
well-being and soul satisfaction of another is as important as your own.
Love is the anchor of all long-term relationships.
Pure, unadulterated love can be experienced by all men. The death,
resurrection, ascension, and return of Jesus Christ provide the desire
and the power to love others as it was meant to be. The coming of Jesus
Christ into this world to be taken to His death for others is not only
an example of love it is also the means by which all men can experience
the same supernatural relationship of love.
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